Contributive Tribute
Tom Cruise’s Jack Reacher (2012) didn’t need to feature the Pittsburgh Trib sign. In the eyes of homophobic men, lesbians puts the trib in tribulation. Although Cruise’s films are supposed to represent some kind of male fantasy, they never showcase sapphic interplay. I suppose the excuse is that you can’t afford to offend conservatives in the Bible Belt.
This hasn’t stopped people from casting actresses who kissed women either on or off camera. For example, Tom Cruise scored a triple jackpot when Gina Gershon, Elisabeth Shue and Kelly Lynch were cast in Cocktail (1988). The logic behind it is that if you’re going to turn a man into the world’s biggest movie star then find a way for sapphic actresses to ride his bandwagon. It was the gay owner of The Geffen Film Company, David Geffen, who was responsible for Tom being cast in Risky Business (1983).
Rebecca De Mornay (1) was Tom Cruise’s love interest in Risky Business. Rebecca kissed Vanessa Williams in Boomtown (2003). Tom married Mimi Rogers (2), who kissed Rachel Nichols in Dumb and Dumberer (2003) and Amber Tamblyn in Two and a Half Men (2013). Jeanne Tripplehorn (3) kissed Salma Hayek in Timecode (2000). Meryl Streep (4) kissed Emma Thompson for Angels in America (2000) and Allison Janney in The Hours (2002). Jenna Elfman (5) played a lesbian in Shameless (2012). Scientology is homophobic, so it’s the perfect cover for Jenna and John Travolta (although he did drop out of the homophobic American Gigolo). There is a line of dialogue in Critters (1986) where someone reads a newspaper featuring a report about Travolta having previously worked as a waitress. Kate Winslet (6) kissed Eleanor Knox in Holy Smoke (1999), and Saoirse Ronan in Ammonite (2020).
Paula Patton (7) played a lesbian in Precious (2009). This led to her working for a real black lesbian (Queen Latifah) in The Perfect Match (2016) and a self-proclaimed queer (Mariska Hargitay) in Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (2010). Léa Seydoux (8) is France’s most famous sapphic actress, hence why Kristen Stewart co-starred with her in Crimes of the Future (2022). Hayley Atwell (9) kissed Keira Knightley in The Duchess (2008), Natalia Warner in The Pillars of the Earth (2010) and Bridget Regan in Agent Carter (2015). Pom Klementieff (10) made it apparent that she had the hots for Karen Gillan. Andrea Riseborough (11) kissed Emma Stone in Battle of the Sexes (2017) and Naomi Watts in Birdman (a 2014 film where Stone was the co-star). Olga Kurylenko (12) kissed Marine Duvivier in Sentinelle (2021), and she was a close friend of Melissa Mortensen (who has dated female models).
Carice van Houten (13) kissed Halina Reijn in De Passievrucht (2003) and Hanna Alström in The Glass Room (2019). Melissa Leo (14) played a lesbian in The L Word (2005), and she kissed Teresa Palmer in The Ever After (2015). Emily Blunt (15) kissed Natalie Press in My Summer of Love (2004). Rosamund Pike (16) kissed Eiza González in I Care a Lot (2020) and Sophie Okonedo in The Wheel of Time (2021). Cobie Smulders (17) played a lesbian in The L Word (2005). She kissed Cynthia Addai-Robinson and Ioanna Gika in Stumptown (2019). On and off set of How I Met Your Mother, Cobie kissed Alyson Hannigan (who previously played a lesbian in Buffy the Vampire Slayer). Since Tom Cruise was raised in the South, you would think that the casting team behind him would have cast Southern actresses who have never played sapphic characters. He has never dated a Southern actress.
Taylor Swift getting married yesterday (on Tom Cruise’s 64th birthday) makes it obvious why they have never taken a photo together. There would be too much meta awareness given how many people have suspected them to be gay. He was raised Catholic; she was raised Christian. Taylor was in the same film as the aforementioned Andrea Riseborough i.e. Amsterdam (2022). Sofia Boutella (18) kissed Charlize Theron in Atomic Kitten (2017) and Sharleen Temple in Climax (2018). The latter is reminiscent of Juno Temple when she had big curly hair. Alix Bénézech (19) kissed Maud Galet-Lalande in Ouvert 24/7 (2010). Alix cares deeply about lesbian romance to have a small role in Summertime (2015). Rhea Seehorn (20) kissed Karolina Wydra in Pluribus (2025). Elle Fanning (21) was in a film where every main actress had sapphic experience i.e. The Neon Demon (2016).
Like the trio of cherries in a slot machine that was the casting of Cocktail, Tom Cruise was seen giving his seal of approval with a four-leaf clover in the form of the stars leading Sex and the City. He didn’t need to be seen with them, or vice-versa. This was actually out of character for Cruise since he always strove to avoid being a TV actor. The event was the 61st Golden Globe Awards in January 2004, so it wasn’t like he was attending the Emmy Awards or the Cable Ace Awards. Hell, it was only this year that Cruise matured enough to attend the Saturn Awards. This happened in early March. Rosie O’Donnell, below, turned 64 on March 21.
When you factor in everything that I’ve typed, why else would a lesbian such as herself be fangirling all over him? When you consider the number of gay men who have bearded for lesbians, why else would Tom Cruise be accused of being a closeted homosexual? When you see how contrived it is for an actress to be born on Valentine’s Day, it’s surprising that there are not more of them born on Independence Day.